While she was “flying” down the road (10 miles over the limit), a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.
The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, “What’s your hurry?”
To which she replied, “I’m late for work.”
“Oh yeah,” said the cop, “What do you do?”
“I’m a rectum stretcher,” she responded.
The cop stammered, “A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?”
“Well,” she said, “I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it’s about 6 feet wide.”
“And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?” he asked.
“You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge…”
Traffic Ticket – $95.00
Court Costs – $45.00
The Look on Cop’s Face – PRICELESS
Brilliant! I’l remember this one and will translate it into Dutch for my own blog!
Translation Tip for Dutchies: Reet-rekker
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If that isn’t the truth I don’t know what is.
This was the weirdest article I’ve ever read..
Quite the giggle tho..
You know that if someone tried this in real life they’d probably end up on the business end of a taser for “resisting arrest”…
Why was he a asshole for doing his job? She was 10 MPH over the limit, get it?
HOLY SHIT! TEN MILES AN HOUR TOO FAST?? FUCKING LUNATIC
i love this
Who let her out of the kitchen anyways?
good one!
revenge to the stupid cops :pppp
Heard this one before, more than once. C’mon people, get creative.